Airport Security

                                                     Airport Security

            As I sit pecking at this black box I can’t help but reflect on how some portions of our lives seem to be becoming more and more surrounded by darkness. My solution is to get outside and smile at the sun, repeat my prayers and try to feel the reassurance of The Big Guy. I invite everyone to do the same.

            I’m going to be traveling again hopefully sometime soon and while attempting to conjure up a readable column the following popped up. I can only wonder how the next person in line fared as I left at a run.

You would think at my stage of maturity I would’ve learned by now there are times to keep one’s big yap shut.

You would be wrong.

I recently found myself in a long line in the security area of a busy airport at a busy time of day behind a large group of very upset travelers. When the security person pulled all of us aside for a random special security screening their annoyance turned to rudeness. They focused their anger on the baggage screener and I felt embarrassment for the travelers and pity for the screener.

I might have saved my pity.

After heaving the last of their large suitcases on the belt she turned her attention to me. I smiled understandingly and said I was sorry she had such a hard time with the previous group, I deal with the people also as I used to work for the company that does pre-employment physicals for baggage screeners.

Her eyes grew as large as the fists her hands had formed themselves into.

Her stare alone could have shredded steel.

Her northern accented voice was just an octave higher than a mother cougar defending her young, and just as frightening, “Oh really! The company that made me take a cardiac test and caused me to miss the deadline for the job I really wanted, so I have to do this job until another comes open? That company?”

My brain kept repeating “Shut up!” But my mouth has a lot of practice working independently of my gray matter and just kept going.

“Well at least now you know there’s nothing wrong with your heart!”

Her eyebrows arched almost to her hairline as she wheezed something about a southern belle catching a flight to Ethiopia.

My daughter shot me a look that said “I’m tired, my feet hurt, and I miss my baby, if you say ONE more word I will HELP her send you anywhere she wants.”

 I stood perfectly still while the screener finished passing her wand over, around, and through various parts of my anatomy, but try as I might I just could not resist a parting “Y’all have a nice day now you heah?”

I received a post card postmarked Addis Ababa this morning, I’ll bet it’s from my luggage.